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Y'alright. It occurred to me just now that I haven't written a new journal since... Feb 20th and that's terrible. The only thing perhaps more terrible is starting almost everything journal with the revelation that I haven't written a new one in quite a long while. I'm sorry, but it's tradition now so uh... Yeah [link]. If you don't like it you're welcome to kill me in the most gruesome and inhumane way possible.
It's April Fool's Day today, isn't that FANTASTIC? Most people are always surprised to learn that I can't stand the day because it's incredibly stupid but yeah, I do. I really do hate April Fool's Day with a passion. If April Fool's Day were a person I'd more than likely have shoved a golf club down it's throat by now before burning the corpse just to be sure. It's an excuse for stupid people to make jokes I've heard hundreds of times before that were never funny without concerning themselves with how quickly I'll punch them in the face... Slightly faster today, if you're wondering. Leave me alone in my little corner of grumpiness and un-fun.
In other news, I'm almost done writing up chapter three of Contract Killers. Due to procrastination, my brother coming home to stay for a while, college work, procrastination and presumably ghosts I haven't gotten around to finishing it yet though. It's largely due to the ghosts if I'm being completely honest with you... Ghosts are dicks. Anyway yeah, it's got a hobo assassin guy, too many references to Condemned/Manhunt and possibly some plot if you're lucky (you're almost certainly not). You kids like that stuff, right?
Anyway... That's all for now from me. I just thought I'd provide a quick update about what I'm doing and what I will be doing because I feel important when I do. As usual, I'll be lingering around the forums and under your beds instead of doing what I'm actually supposed to be because I'm a hardcore motherfucker.

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Vanhir's Profile Picture
~Vanhir
Edd
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United Kingdom
Morning, I'm Edd and that's Julia. I write stories and stuff which some people apparently read, presumably because their drug addled minds can't tell the difference between good and awful literature. I do a fairly broad range of genres and stuff, whatever interests me at the time really.
Feel free to say hi or threaten to kill my entire family or whatever. I'm mostly lingering around on the forums procrastinating if you want to get to the family murder thing faster. Alternatively, feel free to stroke my already inconceivably huge ego by telling me how much of a cool dude you think I am.
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Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconkasimere:
Call him piss lips, but don't tell him I told you to write it.
Reply
:iconvanhir:
~Vanhir May 7, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
You there! Are you a crime-inal? A criminal?
Reply
:iconkasimere:
No one welds a coke can to my radiator, and gets away with it!
Reply
:iconvanhir:
~Vanhir May 11, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Well, he's gone... Which means I can spit on his desk and read his e-mails!
Reply
:iconfalseshepherd:
*FalseShepherd May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
:iconfryplz: Wait, you've only been on here for 11 months? Seems like I've know you a lot longer. :icondalailamaplz:
Reply
:iconvanhir:
~Vanhir May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I've been on dA for a looong while, though not on this account. The long-knowing-ness seems to have flowed over though. :no:
Reply
:iconfalseshepherd:
*FalseShepherd May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
:o

I've only been using the forum a few months now, though. :iconwooooplz:
Reply
:iconvanhir:
~Vanhir May 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Indeed you have, I've marked down the number of days since you joined in goat's blood on my bedroom wall. :nod:
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconfalseshepherd:
*FalseShepherd May 4, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Is this where I can get my porcelain veneers done?
Reply
:iconvanhir:
~Vanhir May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Ye- Wha- ?
Reply
:iconfalseshepherd:
*FalseShepherd May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
I want some vanhir's done, I mean veneers. :nod:
Reply
:iconvanhir:
~Vanhir May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
...Oh, now you're just pushing it. :no:
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconthemelodicartist:
*TheMelodicArtist Apr 18, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
You have a very eloquent writing style. I enjoy your work! *clicks watch*
Reply
:iconvanhir:
~Vanhir Apr 18, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Jesus, are you sure you're watching the right person? :B Nonetheless, thank-you very much.
Reply
:iconfalseshepherd:
*FalseShepherd Apr 15, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Sorry Vanhir, but you have lost some Epic Points. :no:

Brony = Broken Bromance. </3


I'm not sure whether to kill you in a gruesome inhumane way for it yet, or give you time to redeem yourself.

:icondramaticdean-plz:
Reply
:iconvanhir:
~Vanhir Apr 15, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I'm a brony now? :stare:
Reply
:iconfalseshepherd:
*FalseShepherd Apr 15, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Well, maybe not.. But the only acceptable MLP picture to be linked/shared anywhere, is one being brutally removed from existence. :nod:


:iconpsychoticplz:
Reply
:iconvanhir:
~Vanhir Apr 17, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
...Jesus christ, why does Iron Man have teeth and EYES?
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconkeeper-of-pickles:
Why you so charismatic bro?
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:iconvanhir:
~Vanhir Apr 12, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
I eat all my greens, naturally.
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